Follow Your Heart

Earlier this morning I had the chance to mingle with one of my PST wave mates, her name is hara and she is really funny that even the worst situation can turn into a laughing stock. But that's not the purpose of my writing though.

I was given the opportunity to be honest of who I really am. Not that I lied of who I really am I guess it's the silence within me that I why I chose to keep
mum about the issue. I hold this belief that "some-things-are-left-unspoken-and-some-questions-are-better-left-unanswered.."

So while others, without hesitation, divulge who they are infront of others I can't..i Just can't even if my mind wants to say out loud I can't..I don't have
the balls of steel. No one was asking anyway, why bother opening a topic when the topic in question is the one i'm avoiding.

****Friends?

I'm not sure to begin with, yes we came from the same PST class but we have a different set of groups back then,she has her set of friends from CCT while me am just a total stranger because I was not originally from their team, i was transferred to their team because I wasnt able to finish my pst because of health issues..

So while were waiting for our queue she started asking me questions like who do I call during lunch time, what is her name?

To satisfy her curiosity I said to her that the person im calling is not my girlfriend, she then responded carelessly, "Oh your wife?" I said "no", eager to know who that person calling me she continued asking me "Ah soon to be wife?" "No" was the only thing I could tell her.

Confuse of who that person was she exclaimed "If not your wife, fiancee, or girlfriend then who?"

I stared at her in silence for the first five seconds then asked her calmly "Di' mo alam?" "Alam ang alin?" she exclaimed. "Tungkol sa akin?" She stared at me again and finally realized what the hell I was talking about. She couldn't believe what I just insinuated. Then she asked me again whether what I implied was for real or not, I said "yes, I'm in the stage of knowing myself of what I really want and what I don't want., i'm tired of being emo. hirap eh, alam mo un, umiikot ang buhay ko sa isang tao, i'm missing a lot of things in this world..hehehe"

"Hindi halata, pero it's a good thing that your taking the steps to explore yourself, she said.

It felt good opening up to her who I really am not. I felt accepted.

But you know what, first impression as always is not a good way to judge a person, for the reason of passing your judgement without even knowing the persons true color is a form of prejudice. I guess i'm just thankful that hara was not the kind of person I was expecting. I felt a sudden bliss after our short camaraderie.


Thank you Hara for giving me the opportunity to be me.

Happy Birthday To you Hara!